


Valentine's day dumpster diving

by SofiaTheRandomDemon



Series: Sam and Max: Freelance Cupids! [1]
Category: Sam & Max (Comics)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Cupid AU, M/M, Pining, cupid max has gay thoughts, might be a little ooc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-14
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-14 11:41:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,273
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29418066
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SofiaTheRandomDemon/pseuds/SofiaTheRandomDemon
Summary: Cupid Max goes dumpster diving after a long day of work on Valentine's Day and starts thinking about his situation regarding his feelings for his freelance cupid partner.
Relationships: Max/Sam (Sam & Max)
Series: Sam and Max: Freelance Cupids! [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2161089
Comments: 2
Kudos: 40





	Valentine's day dumpster diving

**Author's Note:**

> A writing i did about my Sam and Max AU for valentine's Day, Enjoy!

The sun was setting on New York City, it had been another valentine’s day full of marketing and cheesy couples being sickeningly affectionate, there was a pair of cupids on an alley after a full day of shooting lovebirds. Well, freelance cupids.  
  
Max looked through the dumpster of the alley giggling excitedly while Sam waited for him patiently, leaning against a wall.  
  
Dumpster diving after Valentine’s Day was one of his favorite parts of this job, not only did he got to shoot people for a living but he got to keep all the thrown away presents from rejected confessions, Valentine’s day break ups or that one situation where a guy plans on confessing to a girl and she ends up with someone else or changes his mind last minute and throws away the stuff.  
  
He always shared the candy with Sam but kept at least a half of it to himself since his partner didn’t want to “risk his health” by eating candy that was in a perfectly edible condition, at least for the lagomorph. He also liked to keep the stuffed animals and tear them apart to put them back together, turning them into beautiful Frankenstein monstrosities. He read the letters and laughed at their mushy feeling contents while chewing through the leftover candy when he had nothing better to do.  
  
He kept the bouquets and took every flower out to do that thing where he said _“He loves me”_ and _“He loves me not”_ as he tore out petal by petal thinking about a certain someone.  
  
A certain someone who lived with him on an apartment, shot people to fall in love alongside him and was waiting for him to finish looting the dumpster right now.  
  
It was funny how he was supposed to make people fall in love instead of falling in love himself and ended up falling head over heels for his partner and best friend. His sweet, handsome, charming and funny best friend.  
  
Oh great, now he was getting all lovey dovey and mushy over the guy inside a dumpster.  
  
He remembered when this whole crush deal first started while he looked through all the thrown away letters and signs saying things like “Will you be my valentine?”  
  
  
It all started 2 valentine’s day ago when they had to pretend to be a normal non cupid couple to enter love land to get to a pair of objectives who faked to be a couple to get free corn dogs and were actually meant to be together for real.  
  
Max was wearing a purple dress, a ginger wig, some makeup and a pair of heels which were making him suffer more and more with every step he took forward. How were there people who could walk with those on all the time? He still wondered that to this day.  
  
While he was struggling with every step he took on his disguise his friend and co-worker was looking around trying to find their objectives, wearing a fake mustache and a jacket to hide his wings, which was probably unnecessary since the things were so small they couldn’t lift the canine higher than a few inches off the ground.  
  
After a while of roaming around, and stumbling in Max’s case thanks to those darn heels, they found their objectives in a corn dog stand. They quickly took out their love guns ready to shoot them but before they could even aim at them the “couple” was heading their way, not noticing them yet.  
  
If the objectives saw them with their guns it was game over for them.  
  
Sam quickly took the lagomorph and dipped him with his face close to his, making it look like they were kissing in the approaching couple’s point of view. They stayed on that position for a couple of seconds until their objectives walked past them, not paying them any mind. While Sam looked to see if they had already left with them being unnoticed Max’s mind was trying to process what just happened while a light shade of pink painted his cheeks.  
  
After that they managed to shoot the couple and came back to their office, when Max questioned Sam about the dip thing and he simply said he saw it worked on a movie. The lagomorph brushed off the feeling as surprise, even when he was laying on his part of the bunk bed that night thinking about how close they were to kissing while holding one of his adorable stuffed monstrosities.  
  
  
A while after that he found himself questioning his feelings towards the canine, they’ve been best friends since he could remember, was it normal to think of your best friends as someone handsome you’d definitely kiss given the chance? At least was it normal in cupid standards?  
  
He thought he was probably overthinking the whole situation and decided to ignore the feelings. He thought that if he simply ignored them they would go away at some point and he’d continue his normal life alongside his best friend shooting people and eating Valentine’s Day candy.  
  
 _Boy, how wrong he was._  
  
His feelings kept growing more and more with time until he had completely fallen head over heels for his best friend and co-worker. He decided to keep these feelings to himself instead of telling Sam or anyone about them, Sam probably didn’t even look at him the same way, not to mention that confessing to him might ruin their friendship and make things awkward.  
  
He didn’t often thought before acting or thought much about things in general but this whole situation got his head’s rusty gears moving until it hurt.  
  
He found another box of chocolates, this one was heart shaped and was in a surprisingly nice state, he put it into the bag he had next to him alongside the rest of his loot.  
  
Things went from _“It’s nothing, I can just ignore these feelings towards my best friend and they’ll go away so I can return to my normal life”_ to _“I am in love with my best friend and I write love stories about us on my diary alongside my other novels to cope with my pining since I feel like if I confess I’ll mess everything up”._  
  
He found another stuffed animal, well two stuffed animals joined by sewed hands, a small rabbit and a dog. He sighed and put them into his bag before crawling out of the dumpster.  
  
 **“How was this year’s looting, little buddy?”** Asked Sam walking to Max from the wall he was leaning on.  
  
 **“Pretty good, Sam! I even found a cake!”** The lagomorph took out a piece from the bag to offer it to the dog **“You want some?”** Sam kindly declined and said that Max could have it all. He was pretty sure that trash covered cake was something dogs shouldn’t eat.  
  
Max shrugged and took a bite from the cake while he headed for the car with his partner.  
  
They were both now inside the Desoto, ready to leave for the office. “Hey, Sam?” Asked Max from the backseat with his bag of loot next to him.  
  
 **“Yes, Max?** ” Said Sam looking back at him from the driver’s seat, patiently waiting for Max to say what he had to say.  
  
 **“Can we stop at Stinky’s on the way back? If I barf out my stomach with Stinky’s crab mayonnaise and blue cheese stew I’ll have more room for the Valentine’s Day candy!”**  
  
Sam chuckled at that **“You crack me up, little buddy. Sure we can.”**  
  
  
  
Maybe he should be honest with Sam and confess someday but that day isn’t today.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey!! This was my first time writing for this fandom and actually posting it! Hope you enjoyed it and happy Valentine's Day!!


End file.
